Alexi Murdoch - All my days

Third Day- Born Again

DAWN LOADS OF YESTERDAYS....

"What a long strange trip its been"!!! Moving is a traumatic ordeal at any age, but particularly when you have lived in a place for 56 years...the roots grow deep and spread wide....when they get pulled, it is not without much ado....much dirt lifted and ground misplaced....I feel like that plant I pulled up today in the garden....naked, roots dangling, bare and exposed. My friend Sandy Martin says "life is all about changes"...I use to laugh at her and tell her to "shut it"..but it is so very true....nothing stays the same...time does indeed, not stand still for anyone. So given that small but important detail, I press on toward the mark of the high calling to which I have been called by the Lover of my soul...to heights I can not see, over hard roads I would rather not go down...
For some reason the other morning when I got up and looked out my window towards the mountains, through the pines to the sunrise, these words came to me...DAWN LOADS OF YESTERDAYS.....I have yet to know all that these words mean to me, but am beginning to contemplate them ...... so many dawns have come..so many still to see...another chance...another day for beginnings....My good friend and therapist keeps reminding me that I change "from glory to glory"...and though the road is rarely easy, the burden, when placed in the proper hands, is relatively light...
And so, I go on toward the day that has been given me.......I only have this one.....I can bemoan what has passed, or dream towards tomorrow, but today is all I have...not even today, but only this moment....so, go forward my friends....go forward...

SPIRITUAL ASTHMA

I have been sick with the flu for the past 7 days....wow...I forgot how sick you can actually get with that stuff, but how wonderfully my body is made that it can actually try to burn the culprit out by having a high fever!! Amazing...another thing that is amazing is that my physical body has so many spiritual or life applications and analogies! For example, I still have the residue of lung issues....related to the fact that all my life I have been asthmatic......that for 10 to 15 years I have also been a smoker has just compounded the issue, obviously......so this morning as I awoke with that tightness in my chest and the dire need to cough up phlegm, I thought of how it is the same with my spiritual body....when I don't take care of my self, and even sometimes when I AM taking care of myself, the world creeps in and hands me some disease that I must take care of....the disease of busyness, of doubt, fear, resentment, anger, self-mutilation, time wasting, arguing, and so many other things that take my eyes off of Him....off of what is important. And when my focus is lost, when my eyes wander and I am distracted by what this world clamors about, I begin to have signs of soul sickness....my joy gets lost, my heart gets cold, my thoughts unravel, my mind turns loose, my lungs grasp for the spiritual air they need for living in this world! I get sick, I cant' breathe, I cough up the phlegm that gathers there in my spirit needing to be expelled lest it choke out the necessary thing!!! AIR! ABBA! LIFE! Again....I am fearfully wonderfully made...in ALL realms of my being.....the body heals itself.....the spirit heals itself.....the soul heals itself.....BUT not without the proper maintenance!! Food, clothes, water, climate, medicine, rest, love, care, attention....What is true for the body is equally and unequivocally true for the other parts of us....our soul, mind, will, emotions, thoughts and spirit...they must all be tended with equality or we end up sick and asthmatic.....